Day 319 - Home


We woke to frost on everything.


The Sisters - a trio of mountains in Central Oregon.  (I did get that right, didn't I, TL? Update: I clearly did not get the name right as TL corrected me. These are the 3 Sisters.). On our drive back, we saw 8 mountain peaks - it was that clear out. I don't recall ever seeing that many on the drive home.


Look - the snow that wasn't supposed to be in the mountains. It was MUCH worse last weekend. Still, it does show how stellar our weather forecasts are in this area.

It was very nice to be home. While I was not happy with how things went while we were there, not all of it was bad.  I'll write about at least one of the high points this week. 

Tomorrow night, I am having dinner with an old friend of mine.  He and I have been friends since we were 10.  Ironically enough, his family moved to small town Iowa from Oregon.  His dad is a minister and was sent there to start a new church. In an odd twist of fate, his dad and mom are out here in Portland now.  They have been for the past 8 years or so.  Because he's gay and his parents don't believe in it because of their religious beliefs, he rarely makes the trip up here.  But, this is a big deal because he brought his boyfriend with him. He has never done that before.  It'll be good to see him.

Day 318 - Dog & Rant


This is my dad's dog - a 2-year old Red Lab. He's a bit of a nut who wanted my camera, so he kept jumping at me as I was trying to take a picture. I got to wipe a nose print off the lens after this shot. Notice he's smiling.

Now for the rant:
I am glad the dog was happy because this trip with a couple of exceptions sucked in terms of family.  Tonight capped off the trip by me flipping out at my brother.  My niece is definitely the princess of the family. That was clear every time we got together. The world stopped revolving around the sun and started revolving around her.

Yes, she's almost 18months old and cute and all, but when your 7-year-old asks why no one likes her anymore, you know they have taken it too far.  And, she was so fucking right.  As much as I tried to shield her from it, she and my other daughter got royally fucked with this trip. They were here to admire their cousin - no playing because it could be the "wrong kind". No playing with each other because that might either make too much noise, scare their cousin, or result in an accident where she gets scared. 

Like tonight.  My dad had found a ball we had left at their house years ago.  It was one of the dodge ball-type balls.  And the girls were sent outside to play with it.  My brother, SIL, and their daughter came by for dinner.  My brother immediately grabs the ball and starts rough housing with both of the girls in a game of keep away.  Can you guess where this is going? 

He decides the game is going to end abruptly, but instead of making it crystal clear the game was ending and not taking a turn, he sets the ball down.  He kept saying in a sing-song type voice "don't kick it" to the girls.  You could see DJ the 9yrs old is unsure.  Is he joking? Indigo is totally going to get that ball from him.  He sets it down, she kicks it, and guess who it hits?  Yep. 

He flips out at Indigo. We send her out of the room. Once I hear the door slam, I turn to him and ask why the hell he started a game where this could happen?  "Where I want my kid to get hit by the ball? So I'm not supposed to play with my nieces?"  I ask him how many time he heard me say not to play with the fucking ball in the house.  No answer.  I said this happened because the ball was being played with inside where his kid and everyone else is at danger of getting hit.  I don't care how many times he said "don't kick it" - the game should not have happened.  Then, he starts ranting about how if my kid was listening...blah, blah, blah.  "Yeah, cause her uncle is a great demonstrator of listening skills." He stormed off as did I.  I was not in the fucking mood. 

Did Indigo get in trouble? Yeah, it was a joke gone too far.  But, I think there is an adult who needed to take some responsibility himself.  Did he? Fuck no. He was the adult, he was right, his kid got scared. She ended up basically hiding out the rest of the night. She was afraid to even go into the same room.  Later when she did, she asked my brother for something to which he said "did you ask your parents?" as he looks at us.  Garbanzo is sitting their nodding in an exaggerated fashion "yes" - and my brother is giving Indigo shit for not asking.  So, Garbanzo pipes up "my enthusiastic head shaking would be a 'yes' from Dad." 

What pissed me off more than anything was the fact that this is how it was going to go down. I knew it. We make the trip, my kids get no attention from anyone except their parents, and they are told to basically shut up and not be kids.  WTF is up with that?! 

I have spent most of the time here asking myself "were we like this when we had DJ and she was this age?"  And the answer was no.  We accepted that there were situations beyond our total control. If we felt like we needed total control, we left and went back home. I could never ask a house full of people to not be a house full of people.  That's not fair to them - and it's my problem not theirs.  As I've said before, I look at this and see where this is headed.  I will have two kids who don't have any real connection with my parents as well as at least one brother.  My other brother is fantastic when he is around and has the time. He loves his nieces. He has gotten to know them. He loves DJ's wicked sense of humor. He loves how loving Indigo is to his step-daughter. He gets it.  Just totally sad that he is the only one. 

All I can say, this will not be repeated. I know that my parents want to get everyone together for a holiday gift exchange. I think I'm going to give whoever comes up to stay with us the presents to take back. I'm not apt to come back down here again for a repeat of this visit.  There are other things/person I will miss by skipping it, but I can't do that to my kids again.  Getting together with the family should be fun - not a stressful boring affair where you are constantly getting into trouble for stupid shit.

I'm done. Thank you for listening.

More Alternative Music Debates - Part III

Catch up where we are on this list here:
Part I
Part II

Just a reminder - this is not our list. A local radio station asked their listeners to vote on the artists that should make up the top 94 alternative artists of all time.  Each day, they reveal more of who the listeners picked - and each day Garbanzo and I have a discussion about the latest pick.  This is our discussions for your enjoyment.

We last left off on #29 which was Cake.  Our opinion of Cake: fun band - don't see them in concert as they make you wait a lot and give you very little - or at least in our experience.

Emmy = bold
Garbanzo = italics

28. The Clash - Not really surprised. They were going to be on the list. The question, for me, is more regarding their position on the list. Too low? Ah yes.  Now here is a band that I can get behind!  Pretty decent placement.  Influential. 

27. Kings of Leon - While I like these guys, I can't help but think their position on the top 94 list has more to do with their current popularity.  Sorry - they should be lower, IMO. Not too sold on this one.  I admit to not being terribly familiar with them beyond their one or two songs played on the radio.  Higher than The Clash?  Nope.  I agree with Emmy.  This must be based on their current popularity rather than any long-term contribution.

26. Nine Inch Nails - I KNEW these guys would be on the list.  I think they should have been higher. I think their music as well as how they are approaching the music business. Agreed.  Top 20 at least.  They defined a sound in the early 90's that was different from grunge and an inspiration to others.  Trent Reznor has continually blazed his own path, not just musically, but also in the realm of music distribution and concert ticketing.  Hell, and don't forget just the concert experience. While I have not been able to see them myself, even those who aren't huge fans leave their concerts in total awe. The technology they bring to the music experience is just amazing.  I know we're just talking music, but I love how they are involved in all aspects now.

25. The Smiths - Another group that is not a surprise. But, another group that I feel is too low on the list.  About right. 

24. The White Stripes - I guess I never would have thought about them being on the list. Not saying they don't deserve it, just kind of surprised. I'm not sure that the White stripes are even a top 50 band.  Jack White has sure shown his musical chops (White Stripes, The Raconteurs, a myriad of "side" projects) but there is nothing that the White Stripes as a band have done that should put them this high.  This has got to be more of a nod to Jack than anything else.  I would have rather seen him broken out and separate on this list (a la Morrissey and Sting) than lumped with one band. I can agree with that - break out Jack separately. Instead, his bands showed up twice.

23. Talking Heads - Oh yeah, these guys should be on here.  How can you have seen the Talking Heads on this list but not Oingo Boingo?????  I agree that the Talking Heads should be on the list....but....Thank God they are no Oingo Boingo....they are better.

22. Sublime - Yeah, would have included these guys too. Wow.  Really high (no pun intended) for this band.  They could have done so much if they would not have lost their front man.  Their music is as relevant today as it was 10 years ago.  But it is not a top 25 band.  Top 50, sure.  I almost thought you were going to say "they could have done so much if they would not have lost most of the cells in their frontal lobe!"

21. Dave Matthews Band - While one might not think of these guys as alternative given their mainstream popularity, the different kinds of music they infuse into their sound cannot be overlooked.  Really?  Dave Matthews Band?  I kind of feel like DMB is right there with Hootie and the Blowfish in terms of alternativeness (alternativity?  Alternatude?).  They are a mainstream band with a sound guaranteed to get maximum play across all formats.  (That being said, I like this band.  Just dont see them this high at all.  Maybe a cursory spot...Number 88?) They are NOT Hootie and the Blowfish! They are MUCH better than that.  You saw them in concert - the musical composition of their stuff is pretty amazing.  Look at the Jazz they have brought into Rock. 

20. Smashing Pumpkins - Should be on the list. These guys should have been top 10. 

19. Beck - I love Beck and would have included him on my own list.  Even though his recent stuff isn't as cutting edge as his earlier stuff by some people's opinions, his early stuff cannot be overlooked.  But then again he is part of the Scientology machine...so that could explain some things. Just because Tom Cruise helps this guy and secretly manipulates the world does not mean that he isn't an awesome musician.  Another top 10 pick.  Not saying he isn't awesome, just can't forget the connection.

18. Weezer - Can't exclude these guys either. They grew up during the grunge phase, but brought a mix of sounds together that made their mark. I like Weezer.  in fact, I think they have gotten better over the years.  But they should not be this high.  Another Hot Topic vote.  A Hot Topic vote?  Really? How many of the Hot Topic obsessed even know who Weezer is.  Well, then again, you do, so I guess you might know your own.

17. David Bowie - Fuck yes! Think he should be up higher though. And Emmy drops the F-Bomb!  Top 10.  He got screwed. Plus let's talk about this guy.  He gets fucking hotter the older he gets.  His appearance in Zoolander should go down in history as the greatest cameo ever!

16. Coldplay - Too high on the list, IMO.  These guys should not be in the top 50.  They are pop with a bit of an edge.  These guys need to be in the bottom 50.  Yeah, I have some similar feelings that I do when I contemplate U2. Good stuff, very popular, can do some cutting edge stuff, but are they alternative? Uhm, not sure.

Day 317 - Thanksgiving


A house full of people - 8 adults, 3 kids, and 3 dogs.

Garbanzo, my brothers and my dad seemed to take over the kitchen which is an ironic change given how we grew up.  Growing up, my mom and I were relegated to the kitchen while the boys and my dad watched football and went hunting. To have the women sitting in the living room while the guys worked was a funny change.

While I am thankful for my family, I wish others in the house were too. There was just way too much BS that seemed to be going on. Passive aggressiveness, snide remarks, I finally took my kids and went for a walk. I just had to get the hell out of the bad environment.  While out, Indigo asks if we can just got to a restaurant next year.  When your 7 year old feels it, you know it cannot be just you.

Things finally mellowed out after the food was done. Thanks to the turkey, everyone napped and relaxed as we watched football.  After naps, we had pie - napped some more.  Then everyone took off.

Now we are relaxing while watching movies. The house is quiet, and we are nibbling on leftovers as we get hungry.  This is how it should have been today.

Ah, well - can't pick you family - you just spend your life trying to figure out how to deal with them. 


HNT - Handful


Come up behind me,
Grab a handful of hair,
As you slide into me,
And fuck me hard.
For that, I would be thankful.

Day 316 - High Desert


Central Oregon - at the horizon are the Three Sister Mountain range.  A gorgeous day for late November.

Flashback to the Past

It's been several days since we had sex. This illness has put a damper on things in the bedroom, sadly.  It's always worse when the mind is willing, but the body is not, which has been the case.

So, Friday night, we found ourselves without kids. The ability to crawl into bed together and enjoy the night without any worries.  

Except we are in my parents' house.
Their bedroom is right next to ours.
And the cheap-ass headboard on the bed knocks against the wall.
Fuck!

"Will you give me a mouth-full instead?" I ask him.
"Oh, okay," he said with a grin.  Yeah, like he was going to decline a blow job.

I took his cock into my mouth and started working my tongue along the shaft like I know he enjoys.  Then I took him deep into my mouth and listened to his sharp inhale of air - that sounds that tells me it is where he loves it.  I worked my mouth up and down, pausing occasionally to swirl my tongue around the head of his cock before I took it back deep into my throat.

He pulled me up after several minutes and kissed me.

"I want to be inside of you."

He slid inside of me and slowly began moving careful not to knock the cheap ass headboard against the wall.  But, it started being almost impossible to avoid.

"Grab this pillow, pull the headboard forward, and jam it behind it." I said as I handed him a pillow.

He followed my directions, then resumed thrusting into me.  No headboard issues.  We continued on, pleasuring each other the entire way while being as quiet as mice. 

After we both came, we held each other close - kissing and just holding each other.  I glanced up and caught sight of the pillow and started laughing.  Laughing is probably the wrong word - more like hysterics.  I felt like we were back in college, sneaking around, quietly having sex in my parents' house behind their backs. It just seemed so funny - how being there could toss us back to being 20 years old. But, that's how being with the parents can be, isn't it?