Day 58 - A Break in the Fog

After the snow yesterday, we were thankful that it did not rain like they had expected.  They were predicting that overnight it would get below freezing, and rain would have complicated my morning in ways I did not want.

Garbanzo is off to see his grandmother in San Diego.  We had to have him to the airport by 6:30am which meant everyone was up by 6am (with Garbanzo and I getting up at 5:30am).  I had forgotten about the freezing fog until we turned on the news.

We encountered it as we got near the airport.  Thankfully, we saw that planes were still departing despite it all, so there appeared to be no delays.  Nothing worse than getting up really early just to sit in an airport for a long time.

After dropping him off, we headed home.  I rarely take the girls to school.  So it was fun to drive them up there even though it is an hour round trip from the house.  On the way back down the hill, I was greeted with this site:

The fog was burning off and giving us a glimpse of what the weather for the day would really be like.

A close up view.  Mt St Helens, and uhhm....I don't know which is the other one on the left kind of hidden.  It's Adams, I think.


I'm hoping the weekend goes smoothly.  Last time Garbanzo was out of town, one of the chinchillas was killed by a dog, another was lost (but found the next day right before the cat got him), and the neighbor's tree fell over into our backyard.  That a fun few days.  I could go without a repeat of that trip, thank you.

Happy Friday!

Trouble with a T-Shirt

When I was growing up, the rule about t-shirt content was pretty simple.  No swear words, no advertisement for drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes, no offensive content, and no nudity/sexual content.  There were teachers that sometimes took a more conservative stance like my high school American history teacher who decided that a t-shirt from the Dead Kennedy's concert was offensive to him.  He was the local leader of the Democratic committee and did not like the fact his hero was being represented by this band.

Outside of trying to make sure my girls don't dress like a Bratz doll, dress codes are not something I worry about much.  While my kids may have crazy combinations of clothes, they are always covered and usually weather appropriate....usually.

Last year, I did get Indigo in trouble with a t-shirt at her preschool.  There is an online site that I love (Threadless.com), and they have the coolest t-shirts.  Several times a year, they sell them for $5 or $10, so I'll buy a bunch.  I like clever t-shirts, and it helps me avoid the walking advertisements for kid's shows that are more prominent at a department store.

When I saw this t-shirt, I knew Indigo had to have it.

Indigo takes it very personally when she finds that someone has put raisins in a cookie.  She feels tricked and will tell you all about it.....even days later.  How could I not buy this t-shirt for her?

Then I sent her to school wearing it.  As I'm walking out of the house, DJ asks, "Is that t-shirt really appropriate?"  At that point, the thought had never crossed my mind.  I figure I would ask Garbanzo.  He's a teacher.  He would know.  His response was "it's fine.  It wasn't offensive to anyone but the cookie, and he doubted the cookie would raise a fuss."

We get to preschool, and Indigo rushes up to her teacher to show off the t-shirt.  She loved it.  She was proud.  The teacher looked at me and said, "yeah, she's going to have to change.  If she was going to the local public school, she would be sent home for wearing it.  They would not let her change or turn it inside out."

I was a bit dumbfounded.  And, the teacher, knowing that Garbanzo was a teacher, quickly jumped in and said, "Personally, I understand the humor even though I would never let my child wear a t-shirt that had the word stupid on it.  But, I don't want the other parents to complain." 

At this point, I decided I needed to try another tact (and try not to get annoyed at the passive aggressive comment about my parenting decision).  After helping Indigo get changed, I asked her teacher why the word "stupid".  She kind of hushed me as I said it.  I asked when the word became a "bad word".  She said that they wanted to teach the kids to say nice things to people - not use harsh words.

So, I pushed a bit more.  "Let me get this straight, so there are now good words and bad words? And, these are words that are non-cuss words?"  She said yes.  At this point, I had heard enough.  Did she ever hear about a "teachable moment"?   "Of course" was her response.  "So instead of teaching kids how words can hurt people or when they should or should not be used, we are going to teach them to treat them like swear words? I think kids use these words now because they get a rise out of adults" 

She tried to turn the tables on me by asking what I would do if Indigo said something was stupid.  I told her I would ask her why she thought it was stupid.  I would help her articulate what she was really feeling.  Then I would close with "oh, so you don't like the movie because it is boring, not stupid." Teach the kid how to articulate what they are really feeling.  What a concept!

The teacher had to concede at that point, but fell back on the "local district policy".  Gotta love it when they hide behind a policy.

Ironically enough, she has worn this t-shirt once a week to her current school, and everyone comments how it fits her personality, how they wish raisins would stay out of their cookies too, and how clever the t-shirt is (where did you get it?).  You could speculate that maybe the parents at the new school are less uptight, but trust me, that is not the case.  They are uptight as Garbanzo could tell you.  I would like to think that they know when to care about the word stupid and when not to worry about it.

Or maybe, they know the principal will laugh at them....and ask "really?"

Day 57 - Snow, again!

I won't pretend we got nearly the snow Jennybean and others have gotten.  But, we did wake up to snow this morning.  It was gone by about 10am.  That's the kind of snow that I like.  The kind that falls, makes everything look pretty, then melts soon after.

Chalk Thursday

If you aren't a religious person, you may not realize that Lent started yesterday with the celebration of Ash Wednesday.  Lent is a time honored tradition for Catholics in particular as they give up something and stop eating meat on Fridays.  Lent eventually leads to Easter but not before  "Palm Sunday", "Maundy Thursday" and "Good Friday" are celebrated. (Yes, I know lent is celebrated by many forms of Christianity, I'm just being facetious.)

What you may not realize is there is another holy day in there called Chalk Thursday.  Chalk Thursday was started as a way of honoring those Catholics who have had their ash crosses on Ash Wednesday removed by the ignorant who thought it was a smudge of dirt not a religious symbol of repentance to be worn until sundown.

Let me explain a bit further.

My best friend and roommate in college, Fred, is a good Catholic girl.  She was raised Catholic, attended Catholic school, and even graduated from an all-girls Catholic private school.  The graduation from her Catholic school is a scene that could only be repeated in the south, but I digress.  Anyway, even in college, she attended mass every Sunday.  Heck, Fred was even a virgin until she got married.  (Then she did the good Catholic thing, the shunned birth control in favor of the natural family planning method which is a perfectly good method that resulted in her giving birth to her first child 9 months after the wedding night.  Ahh, irony!)

On Ash Wednesday, Fred and another Catholic friend would walk down to the local Catholic church to attend the Ash Wednesday services.  They would come back with the ash crosses smudged on their foreheads and proceed on with their day.

Enter - Garbanzo, my pretty ignorant to organized religion boyfriend.  He had never noticed the ash crosses on their forehead until that year.  At lunch that Ash Wednesday, he walked up to Fred and tried to be helpful by wiping off the ash cross.  Thankfully, Fred was pretty good natured about it after initially giving him a little Catholic guilt, then spending the rest of lunch educating him on Ash Wednesday, the true punishment for him.

The next night, another friend and I were down playing pool with Fred as she worked in the games room at the college.   We did it to keep her company - and play free pool.

Just so that no one gets this impression that we were some sort of pool sharks or anything, playing pool with us was dangerous.  While we could get good shots periodically, our brand of pool was best described as slop.  No good or easy shot, hit the ball as hard as you can to break up the balls and hope for a good shot later.  Oh, and if you are standing near where the ball was being shot, get out of the way....it could be dangerous.  Fred was particularly adept at launching the balls off of the table.

Garbanzo later showed up (trying to avoid a paper, I think) and joined in the pool game.  Midway through the game, he reached over and put a mark on Fred's forehead where the ash mark was using pool cue chalk.  When she asked what he was doing, he declared that he was celebrating Chalk Thursday.  And, insisted that she wear it until sunrise or it wore off on its own, whichever happened first.  I can still see the look on her face as he was explaining it to her.  It was a mixture of amusement and wondering how and the hell he came up with that one.

To give Fred credit, I believe she did wear it for a while.  She was that kind of a person - really could care less about what others thought.  That's why we all loved her.  That, and when she was tired, her Texas accent, which was never very prominent, would become very thick, and we enjoyed having her say things like:

"There is no basement in the Alamo"  (And most of this scene from Pee Wee's Big Adventure:)


Sorry for the detour, but I had forgotten how much of this we used to have her recite.  In fact, I still can't say "tortilla" like a normal person - it's a combination of that tour guide and Fred.

Anyway, fast forward 17 years later, and we all still wish each other happy Chalk Thursday.

So, Happy Chalk Thursday to you all, I mean, y'all!

Day 56 - Chinchillas

We have a zoo at our house.  Two cats, two dogs, a guinea pig and three of these:

Chinchillas.

We have two girls and a boy.  This one is Pippi.  They are funny little creatures that beg for raisins and banana chips.

They act like prisoners.  They seem to be missing the little cup to bang against the bars.

They are soft guys who unfortunately are a bit shy when it comes to holding them.  They get scared and start losing huge tufts of fur.  Pippi and JJ are better than Sadie.  (The kids have named them all.)

Like gremlins, you can't get them wet.  They could get sick and die.  So you give them dust baths instead. 

And, as we have found out in the past, you shouldn't let them out if you have dogs and cats.  While they are extremely fast, they aren't always fast enough.  Let's just say that last summer, we had four chinchillas.  It was a hard lesson for Indigo, but the cages stay closed now.


(Pippi is the Chinchilla pictured.  The others were being shy and hiding.)

Technology Tip

A few weeks ago, I mentioned how we had a Friday the 13th from hell.  I started telling the story, but never finished it.  Sadly enough, I am not going to finish it.  I don't think there is a way to do it without causing a lot of discussion I'm not in the mood to have.  But I will share with you the moral of the story.

As many of you are getting ready for HNT and who have files on your computer you would rather not have people see or read or access, I would like to recommend some security software that encrypts and secures these files.  Even if they are buried deep on your computer's hard drive, the risk of someone seeing them is still there.   And, if you have a laptop, this should be just something you do. Period. To all of your files.  Laptops are easy to steal, and there are back doors to get to data regardless of what Microsoft or Apple will tell you.  (Trust me, I've had to use them to recover files!)

Before I recommend encryption options, you must first understand that you can NOT lose the password.  If you do, your files are gone.   This is the risk of using this software - you forget it, you are out of luck.  The software company will not help you.  Why?  Because how can they tell it is your files and not your neighbor's files?  They can't, so you are SOL.  If you proceed, you had better have a good password remembering strategy.  And under your keyboard is not one of them.  And, don't trust your IT person with your password either.  I'm just saying. If you have a safe or a lockbox, might I recommend putting a password list in there (you can include the password for encryption). 

Lastly, if you go down this path, you must all raise your right hands and repeat after me:

"I promise not to install any of this software on my work computer.  I understand that if I do this, no amount of beer, cookies or other bribes will get me out of the mess I will be in with my IT department.  I also understand that yelling, begging, crying, or bribing will not do anything but annoy the IT person called.  If I feel I need a solution for work, I will go to the nice IT people and tell them my problem.  Then I will use whichever solution they provide me with, without complaint."   

Had to do that just to cover my bases as these are the worst calls to get if you are in IT because you can't do anything. Seriously, if you feel the need for something at work, go talk to the IT guys.  They aren't all jerks.

For Mac users, I would recommend "goSecure" by GoGoalSoft.  It's $20 and is extremely simple to use.  You open the application, and drag the file or folder you want to encrypt onto the "vault".  It will ask for the password you would like to use, then it encrypts the folder.  By default, it does not auto-delete the folder you are encrypting.  You will need to either check this option before it begins, or you need to delete it afterwards.  To open an encrypted folder, double click on the file and enter your password.   The program will restore the folder to its original state, but keep the encrypted file in tact too.  Very simple.  (Just remember to delete the restored folder when you are done.)

I now have personal experience with this application and would strongly recommend it especially for someone who is not necessarily the most adept user.  

For PC users, I would recommend EncryptOnClick.  A free version is available and it looks as easy to use as goSecurity. Heck, I think there is a chance it is simplier.  I did read conflicting reports on its compatibility with Vista, but have not confirmed because I won't don't run Vista.  They do have a $30 OnClick utilities with encryption that is definitely compatible.

Full disclosure, I have not used this package as I do not have any files on my home PC that I worry about.  It is, however, the one I would download and recommend based on my research.

Another open-source option is TrueCrypt.  TrueCrypt has compatibility with Macs, Windows, and Linux.  And, since it is open-source, it is free.   I should warn you that you should be a little geeky if you want to go this route.  The application can get pretty confusing fast without someone who has the patience to go through it.  And isn't scared of things looking more complex than they really are.  There is a good quick start guide on the site.  The beauty of this program is the fact it can encrypt a files/folders on your hard drive or on a flash drive, memory card, etc.  This program is the most flexible of the three if you want to be able to encrypt multiple devices. 

Again - not a package I have used, but would use on the PC that only I use in the house.

There you go - go off and encrypt those naked files of yourself - or half naked files of yourself.  Trust me, it's an embarrassment you do not want.

Day 55 - Moses Supposes

"Moses supposes his toes are roses, but Moses supposes erroneaously."

 Anyone? Name that movie!

I was awoken at 2 am by this:

Knocking something over and creating one hell of a crash.  A crash that jolted me out of a deep sleep.  I was never able to find it, but from that moment on, I was awake.

And, I had to get up at 5am; thanks to a conference call I had to be at work for at 6am.  I finally gave up at the idea I would just go back to sleep.  My mind was already doing calculations, putting together to do lists, and thinking about how the rest of the week was going to play out.  (Garbanzo is going out of town for the weekend, so I get to run kids to & from school, take them to TKD practice, a TKD tourney, a sleep over, and all that fun stuff. My brain was already starting to work it all out.)

I was up.  I started getting things done figuring I would hit upon something that would put me back to sleep.  Nope.  I watched TV - bad TV, boring TV.  Nope.  Still awake.  I finally just gave up. 


About that time, I also started realizing that I was not feeling well.  But, I was being an optimist, I thought it was because I had been up too early with too little sleep. I thought I was hungry.  I thought I just needed to get going.

Nope.  I got to work, had my conference call, grabbed my work stuff, and came back home to work.  Which in the end was fine, I am always a bit more productive outside of the office - maybe it's all of those drive-bys I'm avoiding.  (Drive-bys are people who come by your desk, interrupt your work, and leave a problem with you instead of taking it with them.)

When Garbanzo and the girls came home with dinner, they had brought me flowers - pink roses. 

Oh, and the quote at the top is from the classic movie Singing in the Rain.  I love that movie.

Sticks and Stones

I've been reading a lot lately about taking back the power of words.  I believe the latest one was on Southern Vixen's page where she discusses her use of the "c-word" during moments of passion, but she was inspired by Sexy Sadie & her HNT confession.

Words, and especially names, have power.  I love reading about people taking back the power of the word.  Turning it from a negative back into a positive. 

For me, the word "bitch" sparks it.  Maybe it is being surrounded by guys in the computer science program who hated being outdone by "a girl", or maybe it goes back to my teenage years living with two brothers.  Being called a "bitch" makes me laugh. 

Garbanzo used to say he knew his day at school was good when he made one of his students cry.  (He is really not that heartless, but, for him, it means his kids didn't walk all over him.)  I have a similar feeling about being called a "bitch". 

If someone at work were to call me that....let me not be naive, when someone at work calls me that, I know I've done my job right by valuing the company above the individual.   Because being called a "bitch" really is the last resort someone has.  They are trying to shift the balance of power by using a word to throw me off.  By embracing the word, you take their last power play away.

When my first born DJ called me the "meanest mommy in the world", I didn't care.  In fact, I thanked her for the honor, it meant I had done my job by not caving.

But some names are harder than others.  Society has a stigma associated with those names.  Stigmas that imply weakness or fault.  Stigmas that are very hard to overcome sometimes.  And, so it is natural to shun the name, to hide from it, to not admit it can be true.

I believe these names serve as an opportunity of sorts.  An opportunity to show that the stigma is not true.  To educate those around you that it can happen to anyone.  That the stereotypes surrounding the name are simply stereotypes used by the uninformed.

Name aside, there is sometimes an issue around who is delivering the name calling or who is standing by watching as it happened. 

I'm currently watching as a relationship dissinegrates over a name.  The name was not delivered by anyone in the relationship, but it is a case where the person it was aimed at is upset about the fact the bystander doesn't get it.  Everyone watching gave that name power including the significant other.

When someone close to you issues you a name or stands by saying nothing as others do, it makes you question yourself.  It makes you question them and their feelings for you.  Do they have the respect for you that you thought they did?  So, sometimes to reclaim the word, you have boot the person.


In the case I'm closely following, I'm hoping that.

Day 54 - February in Oregon

February in Oregon is a tease.  She likes to give us a taste of what is to come - the promise that the rain will go away, then she takes it away from us leaving us to take a cold shower (which was can easily do by simply standing outside in the rain).

It's one thing when February does this to us when one day is sunny while the next is rainy, but the worst are days like today.  Today started out a bit drizzly, but nothing significant.  Then, what sunlight there was went away and the rains came down.  After the rain, it got sunny - like "where are my sunglasses" sunny.

Just when we think the rain was a fluke, the heavens open up again.

Then it gets sunny.

Just to rain again.

I think you are seeing the pattern.

And The Oscar Goes To....

Okay, not really....but I do have an award to give out....

Here are the rules:“These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers. Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award.”

And the award goes to....

• Thoughts of a Princessa of Mexico - I actually know Mexi in real-life, so his blog has another level of entertainment for me.  Mexi is creative and fun - and I love following along especially when he is on vacation in exotic locals like he has been doing recently.  Oh, and his videos are hilarious. 
  
• Irish Gumbo is a more recent discovery of mine.  (I found him thru Hot Dads.)  I love his writing and his humor.
• Hot Dads - I'm going to have to throw my support to these guys too.  Bedside Tales Man has done a great job assembling some great writers for the "daddy site".  
• Just the Girl - She's a mom, a runner, and a person who loves shoes more than I do.  I enjoy the view she gives us into her life.
• Amorous Rocker  is also going to get some love.  I apprecaite her honesty and her sarcasm - and her honesty.  All things that make for a good read.

I know I'm supposed to have 8 total, but I've found that Just an Ordinary Girl and Another Suburban Mom have taken many of the ones that I would have included on my list too.  So instead of including them, I will refer you back to their lists.  (We are a somewhat incestuous bunch, aren't we?)

Thanks again to Just an Ordinary Girl for awarding this to me, and congrats all of those on my list!!
Congratulations to all of the winner! 

Day 53 - Brownies

Hmmm...brownies....don't they sound good? 

But, I'm not talking those kind of brownies, but this kind:

When I was a Girl Scout, we never had to stand in front of stores selling cookies to the customers leaving.  But, DJ did.  Turns out, she was quite the sales person especially when selling the new flavors. 

I told her it was the Brownie Beanie we found for her.

Anyone else quote the movie Adams Family Values when someone asks them to buy girl scout cookies?  You know the quote, "are they made with real girl scouts?"

Or maybe it's just me.....

Weekend Wrap-Up

First off, I want to publicly thank Another Ordinary Girl for giving me an award this week.  I have to pass it along - and do it quick (by the looks of it) because people are already honoring most of my favorite blogs! Stay tuned. :)

+++++++++++++++++++++++

We've been having a fun parenting weekend here at the Emmy & Garbanzo household.  It started Friday when Garbanzo declared that the kids would be without TV, Wii, and computer until their room was clean.  Three days in a row, they were unable to locate things like shoes and book bags.  Each time claiming they were "somewhere in their rooms".  I think Garbanzo's head almost exploded on Friday as they were trying to leave for school, but couldn't because something was "lost in their room".

Yesterday, after Saturday morning taekwondo, we came back and sent them upstairs to clean up.  Within 5 minutes, Indigo, the chief negotiator and legal representative for the two, came downstairs to start negotiations for "help".

Any parent knows that "help" in cleaning the room means "come clean my room for me while I act like I'm helping".  Garbanzo and I swore to each other that this was not a trap we would fall into ... again.  No matter how bad the whining and complaining got, we were holding strong.

We told her "not this time" and sent her back upstairs.  Then the fighting started.  You hear DJ screaming "owww" as Indigo screams back at her.  What I always find funny about listening to this interaction is two things.  The first is the fact that DJ could take her little sister down pretty quickly, yet she is the one that is getting hurt.  This is the same kid who finds humor in kicking the crap out of people in taekwondo yet her less skilled sister can do the same for her.  And the second is the fact that DJ is at least 6-inches taller than Indigo.  I haven't quite figured this one out yet.

Anyway, so the fighting is now going on.  They are trying to solicit a response from us by fighting, an intervention, if you will.  But, I don't feel like playing referee today.  They are hoping I will because it will mean a temporary reprieve as one of them serves their punishment.  Nope - not today.

Soon, Indigo returns "crying".  (She has a great fake crying act.)  DJ isn't cooperating. She is doing all of the work.  It is only fair, in her humble opinion, that DJ be forced to clean solo for a while until they are back in equity.  Yep, that failed too - and she was sent back upstairs.

Now, it is DJ's turn to plead.  Indigo is not helping, and to make matters worse, Indigo has thrown shoes at DJ thus making her cry.  I hear Indigo yell from upstairs, "But I've said sorry a whole bunch of time!!"    I call them both downstairs because they are both in trouble.  Their punishment: to clean their room.

Both kids leave shaking their heads and plotting their next attempt.

Their next attempt is to claim hunger.  I mean, they have been "working hard" for an hour.  They need food.  Indigo comes back down to make their case for food.  There are more tears and more begging.  An agreement is made for when lunch will be served.  They are to work until then.

After lunch, they decide to use diversionary tactics.  Indigo wants to show us her new jump roping tricks.  They have a jump rope club at school, and her coordination is finally getting to the point where she can jump without tripping over the rope.

She performs her demonstration while DJ slinks off to "not clean".  To ensure the demonstration last as long as possible, she brings her PE teacher into it claiming she has been told to practice at home.  She doesn't want to let the teacher down.  After about 30 minutes of this, she's sent back upstairs.

Within minutes, she is back to complain that DJ is not helping (again) but instead is laying on her bed sleeping.

I send Indigo back upstairs with instructions to first start by picking up all of the books and dirty clothes. She stomps back up the stairs, and issues the orders to her sister.

Here is where the kids decide to use the divide and conquer method of negotiations.  I was off doing something in another part of the house, and they knew that Garbanzo wasn't in the room to hear my initial instructions to them.  I love the innocence of children.  Do they think that as children, we didn't try this same trick?

Indigo comes downstairs and tells Garbanzo that they are done picking up the books and dirty clothes.  And, that, per the agreement they had with me, this was all they needed to do to get their privileges back.  They have held up their end of the bargain, so they expect him to honor the agreement I made.

They didn't know where I was - but they didn't factor into it that I was in another part of the house. ... and could hear them.  So I yell out "I didn't say that".  The kids say nothing more, and head back upstairs.

My favorite tactic from yesterday was "DJ is very very sad and can't come down and talk to you - so I'm here to negotiate her release from cleaning."  We told Indigo that we could not negotiate this through a third party, and that DJ needed to do her own negotiations.  Soon, DJ came down with her super frowny face and slumped over shoulders.  She is all upset because her day has been wasted.

Garbanzo and I decide to play good cop & bad cop.  He takes the good cop role.  I point out to both of the kids that if they had used half of the time spent trying to get out of cleaning on the actual cleaning, that they would be done by now.  For some reason, maybe it's the fact it is getting close to bedtime, the light bulbs turn on for them - and they realize they have screwed up their own day by not doing what they were supposed to do.

Within an hour, they get it 75% clean.  Now they are finishing it up....or so we hope.

And, if my parents heard this story - they would laugh their asses off.......because this is EXACTLY how my brother and I were when we shared a room at this age.  Damn Karma!

Day 52 - The Places You Go

This was on the way back to the Taekwondo school.  When Garbanzo saw this picture, he didn't know where I had taken it.  Ironically enough, he passes by this barn every day to and from school.  The steep curvy road he takes to get up to his school passes right by it.

Another view from the school Garbanzo teaches at and the kids attend.  We passed by on our way back to the taekwondo school.  Notice the snow on the coastal range out in the distance.  I should have payed closer attention to that this morning, so the rain and cold tonight wouldn't have been such a surprise.

On the way back from the store, we passed this building.  Even in color, you would think the store was located in the middle of a war zone.  Or believe it is in the old, un-revamped area of North Portland near where we live.  (North Portland is still considered by many to be the 'bad part of town'.) Neither are true - this is in a fairly upscale neighborhood.  When Portland doesn't like the way something looks, the planning group goes in and tears everything out.  Then they rebuild it.  I guess that's what they started doing here.  Regardless, I liked the way it looked.

Medical Fun

A couple of days ago, I went to the doctor.  I hate going to the doctor.  I must say that straight off.  I think my hatred is due to the number of times I saw a doctor before the age of 12.  When you have 6 sets of tubes in your ears, numerous ear infections and other related stuff - you get poked and prodded quite a bit. 

To share too much, I had to go talk to her about the fact my cycles went from super predictable to insanely irregular in the span of a year.  My mom hit menopause really early, so I was a bit concerned I was following that same path.....at 35.  Unlike my mom who just assumed it was normal and went about her day, I decided to take control of the situation plus I have a great doctor who I knew would not blow me off or throw medication at the problem.  She would actually figure out what was going on.

It was good getting confirmation that this was not normal.  It was good getting confirmation that we needed to figure out what was going on.  It was good to hear that nothing obvious was jumping out at her as to the cause.

Her concerns, however, are my thyroid and that I may be anemic.  So, I had blood drawn to test for both.  And, I would like to know what the lab tech did to bruise my arm the way she did. I have great veins for drawing blood, so usually can avoid the bruising.  And, boy, did that woman bruise the hell out of my arm. I'll be wearing long sleeved shirts for a few more day. 

So, while I wait for the test results, she has put me on birth control which just makes me laugh really. Who would really think that after 6 years of not having to even think about birth control because we are done having kids and took a more permanent route, I would be talking birth control with my doctor.  But, if it works, I will deal with the irony later.  (And, for the record, my doctor found it funny that we were talking about this option given my history, etc.)

And, in the meantime, I am fluctuating between worrying about what the test results will say.  On one hand, I want to get the call saying it is a thyroid problem because they can treat it and get my body chemically back in balance.  Plus, it would be a quick and easy explanation.  Yet, on the other hand, I don't want to hear that.  Hearing it will mean medication and possibly more tests.  Both things I hate.  (Yes, hate is a strong word, but I believe it is the right one.)

And, being a technology geek who can find anything on the Internet quickly is a dangerous thing.  Let's just say I will be staying away from Google until I get the call from the doctor.

So, stay tuned.  My apologies in advanced because you will hear more depending on what they find out.  Nothing like a medical issue to provide blog material.

Day 51 - Odd

The idea was simple - get a picture of my first born DJ with her blue belt. (I have a picture with her at each level.)  Except, I hadn't counted on the fact that post-sparring, she's a bit nutty.  So, I ended up with pictures like this:

"I'm not smiling. I am sweaty and don't want my picture taken."

"I won't smile.  Hey, don't poke me!"

"Okay, I'm smiling.  Are you happy??"

"Hey, where did that hand come from?!"

"Here's a happy face!"

Yeah, I can't take a normal picture of her.  She has a wacky expression in each one.  And, she is pretty proud of it which means she won't stop anytime soon.  Can't wait until she's a teenager!

Baby Food

A comment about a week ago that received a bunch of interesting responses was the one where I revealed that I made my kid's baby food instead of buying it.

Yes, I guess I was being a "hippie freak", Hubman.

Whenever I reveal this to someone, I am always amazed at the response.  Why?  Because it is so freaking easy - and not very time consuming to do.

I won't pretend I can write the book on how to do it, because I found out afterwards that I did some things that go against the "baby books".  Things like introducing honey to a child younger than a year old.  My kids' pediatrician laughed at me when I confessed that one.  And, I gave my younger than a year old yogurt.  I know - but yogurt doesn't have the lactose that milk does because the active cultures break it down....that was my rationale anyway.

What I did was very simple.  Babies start out eating the simple things - apples, bananas, pears, sweet potatoes, carrots, squash, etc.  These are all things that are easy to bake and/or steam - if you have to cook them at all.  I would simply buy the produce at the store or Farmer's Market along with our usual veggies and fruit for the week, and they were usually organic, (thus adding to my Hippie Freak status, I'm sure).  Then, I would cook them until soft.

Let me point out that I don't read directions so writing them usually results in statements like "cook until done".  I'm not being a smart ass, really - it is the way I approach things. I mean, I don't know how your stove works, it may take 30 minutes instead of the 20 minutes it takes in my stove.  But, I digress.

Most of the time, I would clean up the sweet potatos, potatoes, and squash - then bake them all until they were soft.  The apples, pears and carrots, I would steam usually together.  Then I used a ricer or a food mill to make it smooth.  You could use a blender or food processor, but that would mean more cleanup which means I avoided it if I could.

Once they were all made smooth, I would freeze the resulting baby food for the week ahead.

When they were just starting out, I froze them in ice cube trays since one ice cube was about the right portion for a 6 month old.  Once frozen, you pop out the ice cube trays and put them into freezer bags.  When they got older, I bought a bunch of very small resealable containers and froze them in there.  Each morning, when we were getting ready to go to daycare, I would pull out a couple of the containers and throw them into the diaper bag.  The daycare would simply warm them up when ready to use.

As they got older, I would create concoctions.  Frozen blueberries and cooked apples in a blender was a favorite.  Or apples and bananas.  I would even throw some baby cereal in for added texture (especially if the apples were pretty watery).  And, this is where I would throw in yogurt as well.  I called it my baby smoothie.

I did not, however, cook anything green using this method.  When they got to a certain point in their eating development, I would just steam up beans and feed them to the kids (supervised, of course).  Same goes with peas.  I'm sure you could do it, but this would have required more work than I was willing to do.  Peas have an outer skin you would have to get rid of, and beans can be stringy.  Again, too much work for me.

If I fed them meat as they got older, I would simply feed them off of my plate in small sizes.

Do I think taking this route mattered to my kids? I'm not sure.  My kids will eat anything.  When we go to the store, they beg for veggies and fruits.  They get excited when our box of veggies arrive each Monday.  They have shown all of the neighbor kids where the snap peas and cherry tomatoes are in the yard so they can eat them as snacks as they are playing.  Was that because I fed them non-processed baby food?  I have no idea.  I would like to think it helped and wasn't just some hair brained idea I had.  I mean, Garbanzo and I love good food.  We love cooking with fresh ingredients and making things from scratch.  Maybe doing this showed them our love of food from the start.  Who knows.  All I do know is that it worked.

And, I should mention during this economically challenging time, that I'm pretty sure we saved money going this route, though I never took the time to calculate it.

Like I told my sister-in-law when she recently asked, the whole thing was pretty easy.  It would take me maybe 1-2 hours tops on a Sunday afternoon to make a week's worth of baby food.  And, that includes the time it took for the food to cook.

So there you go - baby food making demystified.

Oh, and for those of you whose kids are too old or you are beyond adding more to your herd, this is fun to do for someone else's baby.  They make funny faces.

Day 50 - Vegan Food

As I have mentioned before, Garbanzo is a vegetarian.  Being married to a vegetarian is a pain in the ass a wonderful adventure especially when you are trying to eat out.  I won't go into how much fun it is to do this while traveling through an agricultural area.

Three doors down from the taekwondo dojang is the best restaurant.  It is a Thai restaurant called Sweet Lemon.  All of the food is vegan - all of it.  The owners are a Vietnamese couple who have a religious belief that dictates veganism as a way of honoring God and God's creatures.

We eat there at least once a week.  They prepare everything upon order, and the veggies are always fresh and perfectly cooked.  Our favorite is the curry soup.  It's amazing.

Now for those of you who are going "yuck", I will assure you that you likely wouldn't be able to tell it is vegan.  I've had bad vegan, and it is flavorless.  This is not that kind of food.  We have fooled many people with this place - people who could spot vegetarian food a mile away.

And, the girls love this place too.  Why? Because the owner's wife spoils them.  Every time we go in there, she is feeding them cookies and stuffing their pockets full of fortune cookies.  And they love Garbanzo.  They order his favorite veggie jerky stuff because he likes it.  That's the only reason they carry it is because of him.

The Chick Card

While I am on my soapbox this week (and it seems that I am), I must discuss my hatred for what I call "the chick card".  The Chick Card, for me, is defined as the act a woman falls into where she acts cute, coy, helpless, unintelligent, and naive in order to get what she wants/needs.

I see woman at work play this card.  And, they use it when they don't want to do something.  Since I'm in IT, I see women use the "chick card" with my male coworkers - a LOT.  Since many of my male coworkers are nice guys who their mom's raised well, they fall for it.

Let me give an example that happened just this morning.  An executive administrative assistant insisted that my highly paid network engineer be here to start a video conference for the president of the company.  I have personally seen this executive admin start video conferences before without even flinching.  But, I think, she just didn't want to do it.  My network engineer has shown her this process about 20 times.  He has had her write down the procedure the last 7 times.  Each time, she "forgets".....and plays the "chick card" on him.  So, he caves.

What is worse is the fact he knows he is having the card played on him, but, as I mentioned above, his mom raised him to be a gentleman - so he would never call her on it.

Another example: the cute blond Sarbanes Oxley (SOX) auditor from a high paid financial auditing firm.  She used to play dumb to get the guys to reveal our deficiencies.  She was good at it, very good at it.  But she stopped when I called her on it one day.  She was going through her act and forgot that I was sitting in the cubicle next door.  I got her to change her demeanor right in front of the guy who got suckered into it which made his jaw drop.  And, that was the last year they sent her to us. I guess she lost her edge over us, the clients.

I guess what astounds me most about the "Chick Card" is how far it sets women back.  Women are in all areas of business, government, politics, etc proving they can be on par with men.  Yet, when I see them do this, I watch all of those years of progress slip away as the traditional roles are back in play.  The big strong man helping the helpless but cute woman is all good as a plot for a poorly written romance novel - but doesn't fit well into real life especially if, in real life, you are trying to get some creditability and respect from male peers.

But, maybe I hate this because I've seen it backfire on women.  I had a coworker who used to play the "Chick Card" with coworkers, and they stopped listening to what she had to say when she was trying to contribute.  I would have to step in as translator between her and the male coworkers.  While I was annoyed by the fact the men would not listen to her anymore, I was more annoyed she didn't see how she got herself there.  Ultimately, she did figure it out - and realized she had damaged her internal reputation to the point she needed to start over at another company.  I kept in touch with her for years and know she never made that mistake again.

Oh, and that executive admin who uses the card quite frequently - the President of the company who she supports won't listen to her anymore.  If something cannot be done, we have to go personally tell him that.  Sending the message to him through her will not work because he doesn't believe her.  Guess he doesn't trust she is truly competent since she is always running to us.

Maybe I'm missing an advantage in playing this card.  Am I?

Day 49 - School

When Garbanzo started teaching at his current school, I was in love with it.  His school sits as far outside of Portland as you can get and still be within the city limits.  It sits on top of the hill overlooking the valley below and is surrounded by farm land.

When we realized our neighborhood school was not going to work for us, we transfered our first born DJ up to go to school up there.  Since the principal's son was up there too, we knew the transfer would get approved.

This is the old barn that sits where the old school was located about 100 years ago.  I love the fact that all of the kids know the story about how the school was moved down the hill to its current site.  I mean, how many elementary school kids have that sort of history about their school?

But, the view is what is spectacular.  As the days get longer, I'll be able to get some better pictures.  But, I think you can get the idea.

In Garbanzo's old classroom, this was his view out the window.

Oh, and I should also mention the wildlife around the school.  Cougars have been spotted hunting in the back field.  So have coyotes.  And, the kids love it when the local elk herd finds its way through the playground.  Imagine tire swings over the upright bar and just a big old mess.  And, I can't forget the eagles that perch in the trees and hunt for mice in the field.  It's a great experience for a bunch of city kids.

The Mommy Blog

I don't know what sparked me to actually think about the label "mommy blog", but it has been something that has stuck in my head for a few weeks now.  I guess the reason that label has taken up residence in my noggin is because I don't necessarily like it.

I mean, I did use it the other day to describe a blog Fairy Flutters, but even then I didn't like using it.

For me, a mommy blog is something I used to read right after my first child was born.  It is a blog purely about the trials and triumphs of being a mommy, and documenting the experiences with the kids.  These blogs I would use in the early days of my mommy-hood to get ideas, feel a bit better about myself & my child rearing skills, and just seeing that someone else made it through this phase.  To be honest, though, I haven't read a pure "mommy blog" in years.  I don't find them to have many dimensions, and I like dimensions.

This is why when I read women's blogs, I don't necessarily think of them as mommy blogs even if they have kids. They have so many dimensions - and being a mom is just one of them.  Whether stay-at-home mom or working outside of the home mom, the blogs are all about trying to find the balance between being the mommy, being the wife, being the lover, being the good PTA member, being the good employee, being a good child/sibling, etc.  In my mind, the common denominator in all of them is women trying to navigate through life and these various roles they have.  And, sharing their experiences along the way, sharing what keeps them up at night, and sharing the successes as well.

These dimensions are what draw me to their blogs time and time again. The occasional stories about the kids are inevitable, I mean, you can't be a mom (or a dad) and not have them.  But the other topics are what keep me going back day after day.  I can relate to them.

So what do we call them instead because mommy blog just isn't do it for me?

Day 48 - Puzzles

Right after we were first married, I made the mistake of solving one of those mind puzzles in front of Garbanzo.  We had walked into an odd little store, and there was a display of various puzzles where you had to separate the hoops or remove the hoop from the contraption.  He picked one up and confessed he could never solve them.  My mistake was to solve it while he was talking.

What has started since that day is his quest to find a puzzle I cannot solve.  The year he bought me flint and steel so that he could see if I could start a fire without a match was probably the worst he stretched the definition of "a puzzle".  He has taken to buying these puzzles, disassembling them, and destroying all evidence of what the puzzle even looks like when assembled.  Then he will wrap each piece in each present at Christmas.  Oh, and I guess I should point out that this is his Christmas quest.

With the exception of the flint & steel, I have solved all of the puzzles he has bought me.  He times me at them - and the longest one took me about 2 hours.  Some friends got into the game one year for my birthday.  They decided they didn't want to play anymore after I got close to solving the puzzle they had bought me within minutes after unwrapping it.

This year, the puzzle was a game called Pentago .  It's like connect four, except you have to connect 5 & after your opponent adds a marble, s/he gets to rotate whichever section of the board s/he wants.  And, can I just say, he is kicking my ass at this game.  It has an element of chess in it which you would think I would be great at - except that would require concentration and patience which I don't usually have.  I did beat him once, but only after I plied him with alcohol.

Can I claim that this doesn't count because it is a game, not a puzzle?

Kids and Calculators

Yesterday as Garbanzo was watching the video of Clifford Stoll giving a speech on education and technology (it's up on his blog - take a watch if you have 18 minutes), a part of his speech made me laugh.  I didn't laugh because it was funny, but because here was this brilliant man mentioning how much he believes computers should be taken out of the classroom.

And, I agree with him.  And, can I throw in the mix that so should calculators?

I won't pretend I understand Stoll's reasoning because I haven't read his book, and the video didn't go too far into it.  But here is my reasoning:

Math is a process - and kids are no longer learning the process.

I have been roped into tutoring kids in advanced Algebra classes off and on over the last 15 years, and the common issues they are having are two fold.  Their teachers are no longer teaching the process - and they are allowed to be highly reliant on their calculators to tell them the answer.

What you end up with are very smart kids who can't get the right answer if their lives depended on it.  They rely heavily on the calculator for telling them the right answer, but they don't know the process, so they can't get the right answer.  Ahh....the great irony of the calculator....

Let me give you an example.  Two girls I tutored at different times who went to different high schools had the same issue.  There is a phrase they used to teach kids so they could remember the order of operation - or what you do first, second, etc in a math problem with multiple things happening.  My Dear Aunt Sally - or Multiply, Divide, Add, then Subtract.  When you get older, it changes to Please Excuse My Dear Aunt Sally - or Parenthesis, Exponentials, Multiply, Divide, Add, then Subtract.

When these girls were presented with this:  2(5+6), for example, the would get 16 not 22.  Why? Because when you put that into a calculator, you should do what is in the parenthesis first, then multiply by 2.  They would multiply 2x5 then add 6; simply doing it from left to right.  Both could not figure out why they couldn't get the right answer.  They were missing a basic math strategy for problem solving; a concept that is ever present throughout math classes. Heck, I used it in Linear Algebra my senior years of college.

So, I guess that is why I don't disagree about computers.  While having the paper nicely typed up and printed off of the computer makes it easier to read, is the point of the paper how neat it is or the content of the paper?  It should be the latter.  And, a great example is something Garbanzo is continually faced with - plagiarism.   Just last Thursday, I spent time "googling" key phrases from some of these kids papers hoping not to find the source.  (But each time finding the source - and pretty quickly.)  While you could run into the same problem with books, I think the fact the source is pretty much known by the teachers and the student helps keep some honesty.  Also, since they are shared resources, the idea of taking notes and returning the book for others to use helps them get into the habit of reorganizing their ideas.  Right now, plagiarism is a mere cut and copy away.  At least if they were copying it by hand, there is a chance they would give up before copying it all word-for-word.

Let me put it another way  -  if you were learning to build a house, you would learn about how to put up the walls in what order, what is done first, what is done last, and how to use the tools.  But, simply learning the tools wouldn't mean you could build a house.  No, you still need to learn the overarching concepts. The tools are simply tools to aid in the house building.  They do not ever replace the knowledge of house building.  Same thing goes in the classroom - you cannot replace the process and concepts of math or writing or anything with calculators or computers.  They are only a tool - not a replacement for the knowledge.

This is why my kids are not allowed to use calculators when working on math problems.  They are not always on the computer - heck they have to write out any papers or speeches they have had to make for school.  We type them up after they are done.  Oh, and I do tell all of their teachers this philosophy I have (and I'm sure Garbanzo apologies to them afterwards in an attempt to keep a good working relationship).  It's kind of like my philosophy on homework, but that's another post....

Day 47 - Harry

This is Harry.  Harry is our 5 year old black lab mix - heavy on the mix.  He is technically my dog, but he and I are usually at odds.  In our house, I am the alpha dog (which I am sure is surprising the hell out of many of you).  Harry really wants to be in charge, so he eats all of my shoes.  I believe he has easily eaten about $1000 of shoes....and I only wish I were exaggerating.

Harry is our barker.  He has gotten us into trouble with our neighbors because he feels that he must protect the neighborhood from the mailman, neighbors, people riding their bikes, etc.  And, he does this all day long - sits by the back door begging to be let out so he can patrol the parameter of the yard barking at everything.

The Triple Award!

On Thursday, the lovely and talented Another Suburban Mom nominated me for the Triple Award.   I was quite pleasantly surprised to be quite honest.  I'm a newish blog, and I don't know what my theme would be.....other than revealing the odd way my head works as I go through my life.

So thank you, ASM!  I appreciate it - and totally believe you deserved the nomination yourself as I love your blog!

So here are the rules:

1. Have to post the fabulous Logo (as seen above)

2. Nominate some folks for their blogs.

3. Have to hyper link your nominees.

4. You must tell your nominee that they WON!

5. Finally Hyperlink the blogger who gave you such a wonderful gift.

So, here are my nominees:

• Sunshine on My Toes - I am a midwestern girl, so I love reading Jennybean's blog.  I love seeing the ice towns the pop up on the frozen lakes, her explanation of the various types of corn, and I love her HNT contributions.  I still think the banana is one of the best. 
• Fairy Flutters - This is a blog I recently discovered.  It is a mommy blog, but I like the way she goes about it.  Check her out.  Oh, and congratulate her on her recent news! 

Like ASM, I have to throw kudos to Amid Life's Crisis, Hot Dads and Yet Another Day in Paradise.  I enjoy all three of them as well.  

Day 46 - Presidents and Roses

President's Day Weekend is a milestone in the Portland area.  It marks the time when you have to go out and cut your rose bushes back.

Portland is known as the city of roses because our climate is ideal for growing roses.  We are home to an international test garden, and roses simply thrive here.   We have our annual rose festival in June which is marked by a couple of parades, the crowning of the rose princess, and the welcoming of the naval ships onto the waterfront.

Each year, I forgot to cut my rose bushes back until it is almost too late. Usually it happens because it is raining out, and I don't feel like standing in the rain cutting back the roses.  Today, the rain turned to blue skies.

And, everything is budding.  Here is my plum tree in the parking strip.  It clearly is getting ready to bloom.

And a rose bush cut back within an inch of its life.  We've had this one in our yard for 10 years now.  It grows the most amazing roses - and I do nothing more than give it  a hair cut periodically.  Oh, and feed it my used coffee grounds.  They love old coffee grounds.

After the rose bushes, I tackled the flower beds because I had a few things in there that needed a haircut. This is why I will never spend the money on a manicure.  It would be a waste of money.

(And yes, there are such a thing called gloves - but some of the weeds we get in our yard cannot be removed by gloved hands.  Well, I guess they could - but their roots wouldn't - and then I would have to weed more.  Small price to pay really.)

The Valentine's Day Fairy

Last night around dinner time, we got a text message from Ms Panda, the 21-year old that has been helping out with our kids since they were born and who is pretty much an extension of the family.  (I wrote about her here .)  Anyway, Ms Panda was asking if we would take some flowers to her mom for Valentine's day.    She had sent something up to her, but it hadn't arrived like it was supposed to.

Ms Panda's dad has Alzheimer's.  And, the past 9 months has gotten pretty bad with her dad not really remembering anyone anymore.  He knows Ms Panda and mom, but that's about it.  I think she wanted to make sure her mom got something from Valentine's day since her husband is lucky if he remembers his wife let alone Valentine's Day.

So, DJ and I set off to find purple flowers for Ms Panda's mom and to play Valentine's Day Fairy for Ms Panda.  I love her mom.  She is a bit intense at times, but is a very caring woman who would truly give you the shirt off her back you needed it.  And, despite her attempt to smother Ms Panda, she has done a great job raising an independent daughter.

We arrived on her doorstep with purple flowers and chocolates.  And, I thought Ms Panda's mom was going to burst into tears.  She asked if Ms Panda had set this up - and I said she had.  She stammered out how she was an adult, and she knew how mail worked & could have waited the extra day or two.  I put my arm around her and said, "she wanted you to have something today - she knows you could have waited, but she didn't want you to have to wait."  She hugged me and said "thank you".  Then turned her attention to DJ who she hadn't seen in about 6 months & was blown away by how tall she was, etc.

Meanwhile I got a glimpse at how bad things were progressing with Ms Panda's dad.  He was just kind of standing there off to the side a bit lost.  Her mom finally turned to him and walked him back into their kitchen to give him his dinner.  You could tell he knew he should have known us, but didn't.  And, when DJ and I were looking at the old pictures on the fridge  - the pictures of him, Ms Panda, DJ and Indigo, he was listening intently like he was trying to remember that for tomorrow.   I can't imagine how hard it is for his wife and daughter.  This man two years ago was brilliant.  And now, he has to be reminded to say "hello".

DJ understood how important this was despite the fact she doesn't really truly understand what has happened with Ms Panda's dad.  This was a guy who used to feed her apples when she was young.  And, if they were out when she came over, he would go and buy her some.  He would read her stories and feed her apples.  And, now he doesn't even say "hello" unless prompted.  She said when we got back in the car that she was happy we did that for her.   So was I.

+++++++++++++

Another Suburban Mom gave me an award on Friday.  I haven't forgotten about it - but will post more about it later.  Just haven't had time yet....stay tuned for more on this later!

Friday in Review & Day & Day 45 Photo

This week was definitely one with lots of ups and downs.  And, the Friday the 13th being a bad day definitely proved to be true.

Yesterday started off well. I mean, how could it not if you start the day playing with a 7 month old?  That was definitely the high point of the day though.

DJ and Garbanzo are going to go see his parents in Mexico over spring break.  We discovered after making this decision that her passport had expired.  No problem, we thought.  Yeah, right.

First off, you cannot go through the process outside of the hours 9am - 3pm Monday through Friday.  Garbanzo left school an hour early with DJ on Tuesday.  After 20 minutes in line, he was told that they could not finish the process without my consent.  I could either come down with them, or get a form signed and notarized.  Both are very convenient options (please note that I say that very sarcastically!).

We made the decision instead to go do that on Friday.  I would work from home in the morning, and Garbanzo would take half the day off.  We would get this done - then go out for lunch together.

We got there at 12:30pm and were third in line.  Things were looking great until we got to the front of the line.  I love my husband, I really do, but the man is NOT the most detail oriented.  He is more of a "big picture" guy.  The woman pointed out that we had neglected to fill out the social security number on the form.  He looked at me and asked if I had it on me.  Yeah, cause I carry them on my person at all times.

So, off we went to get the number at home.  By this time, it is 1pm.  And, have I mentioned, we are trying to get DJ back for her Valentine's Day party in her classroom?  We get the number, double check the form to ensure we have everything this time, then get back to the post office.

This time around, we get everything squared away.  And, we paid the expedite fee so we can be sure to get it back in two weeks.  By this time, it is 1:30 - and we still have not had lunch.  We swung by a great pizza by the slice place, grabbed a slice, and headed up to the school which is roughly 30 minutes away. We arrived there about 10 minutes past 2.

But, this was not the highlight of the day (or shall I say the low point of it).  Nope that was still to come.  I think I will end this story right here because to be quite honest, I am not sure if I'm ready to talk about this one yet as it was a pretty big deal.  Just call me a tease.

I will say that it involves a 7th grader doing something he was not supposed to be doing, and a substitute teacher seeing something she shouldn't have seen.

And on that note, I leave you with my picture of the day.

DJ's Saturday morning taekwondo practice was a a local high school.  Turns out, it was to be an outdoor practice which was not communicated to us.  DJ survived, but it was pretty fucking cold outside.  This was my view of the practice from inside the school.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Day 44 - Humor

I got to spend a few more hours with my niece this morning.  I am working from home so that I can go and vouch for the fact that Garbanzo and I are still married and show there is no parental strife, so that they will renew my daughter's passport.  I guess they changed the rules to reduce the risk of one parent getting a passport than taking the child out of the country without the knowledge of the other parent.  While I find the change important, I find it annoying that both parents have to be physically present to get it renewed.  (The other choices is a notarized form - about as convenient really.) 

I was kind of disappointed really.  I am an early riser and was looking forward to snagging my niece if she was up, so that my brother and SIL could get some sleep.  She slept until about 8am.  I still got to play with her.  And take pictures of her.

Like this one - where she has rabies:

No, really - she has rabies.  It is a stuffed microbe of what rabies looks like.  She loved Rabies.  She loved it so much, that my SIL wants more.  Really, we just want to say things like "hey, look, she has herpes" or "wow, she has the black plague again?".  Our family really isn't right in the head.  I have to admit it.

Want your own microbe?  This is where I got rabies.

SPAM is Fun

I have shared in a past post that I find SPAM humorous.  The other day, I was going through my SPAM folder and decided I need to share my love of SPAM.  I mean, these are gems, people.....how can you not laugh at them?!

Here are my favorites out of the 87 messages I had in this folder.  (My comments/reactions will be in italics.)

• Grow, grow and GROW! (what could they be selling - fertilizer?)
  
• Give her the most AMAZING high ever! (are they selling pot or penis enlargement tablets?)
  
• NOW I'm so tight in the crotch area (but I don't want to be tight in the crotch area; I'm a girl)
• So massive I hurt her (why would someone want that??)
  
• Organic Organ Growth that truly works wonders (well, if it's organic...)
  
• Off the lights and take out your light saber (appealing to the star wars geeks, guess they need to find a girl now)
  
• Make love to her every second (usually they say you should seek medical attention if the erection lasts longer than 4 hours)
  
• My tool is so thick it barely fits (from one extreme to the other - and you still can't get laid)
  
• She spread her legs willingly (true - a big cock would make that occur....not...or maybe they are selling mind control.)
  
• She'll suck it like a Popsicle (again, what are they selling? Because Popsicle are not really that large.)
  
• Girls like it bigger (going after the guy's ego again)
  
• Larger than a python (if your cock looks like a python, I think I'll pass.)
  
• Ride her like a mofo (huh?)
  
• Its raining pleasure for her now (nice)
  
• Age doesn't have to make you flaccid (appealing to the older crowd now)
  
• This will bring fire to her crotch (most women prefer their men to be disease free)
  
• Don't let size stop you from pleasuring her (selling techniques now?)
  
• Taste her up and down (until she says stop? Oh, wait that was lick...sorry, bad reference to an 80s song)
  
• After this the rubbers won't fit (considering I've seen someone demonstrate you can put two hands in a condom, this may not be a good thing.)
  

So there you go, a demonstration, if you will, that you should always skim through the SPAM folder before you delete. At the very least, it may provide you with a much needed laugh.   And, just think, someone gets paid to do this.....hmmm, maybe a career opportunity?

Day 43 - Niece

I love my niece.  My sister-in-law claims she is actually my child.   Or at least she did, until my brother pointed out that she was sick for implying that she is actually his and my child.  Being the good aunt, I fed her smooshed carrots.  She loved them, but had never had non-baby baby food before & the texture made her make some pretty funny faces.

I'll share with you another Emmy fact: I made all of my kid's baby food.  After trying some of the pre-made stuff, I decided I couldn't feed it to my kids if I was unwilling to eat it myself.  At the time, I was working with a woman who was the essential earth mother type.  She grew about 90% of the food they ate, she spun her own yarn, she knitted, she raised chickens, and she was a computer geek.  She always told stories about making her own baby food for her son.  (That was 30 years ago.)  I got inspired, especially after trying cream of peas or whatever it was that was in that horrible jar of baby food.

Okay - I'm going back to play with my niece, or at least take more pictures of her.

I Love Sharpies, But They Don't Like Me

I have about 20 Sharpies in the house.  I have standard black, but also every color they make.  I have the fine tipped ones as well as the regular ones.  And, I have recently discovered their Sharpie Pens - they don't bleed through paper and have an ultra-fine point.  Perfect for mapping out business processes at work.

I think my love of them started when I would use them to write on CDs and DVDs.  Wait, that's not true.  It probably started when I was 8 and was allowed to use the big metal Sharpies...you know, the ones that smelled funny.

The problem with this Sharpie addiction is the fact I have children.  Children, who don't understand that Sharpies are not washable.  And, you should not use them to draw on things.

Like the dresser that Garbanzo custom built for our closet....

Indigo was trying to write her name and practice all of her letters, I think.  Because the dresser is kind of built into the closet now, I'm not sure how we will fix this without having to pull it all apart and stain the whole thing....a dark, dark stain - after a good sanding.  So much for the nice oak wood he used.

Or the nightstand next to our bed.  I'm just glad she didn't open it. 

The Sharpies are now hidden in the house...mostly up high where only Garbanzo can reach.  And, Indigo knows they are off limits.  In fact, if she finds one, she now brings it to me. 

I just wish she were more like DJ....who made her little cave drawings in pencil.  I kept this one around because when she is in therapy, because I've ruined her life or something, her therapist might find it interesting.

She must have done this, the night she declared that I was the meanest mommy ever.  Clearly the adult is unhappy and the heart is crossed out.  I wear my meanest mommy ever badge with pride, much to her dismay.

God, I'm so glad we are past this stage.

Day 42 - Valentines

The girls spent the night putting together Indigo's valentine's box for school.  What I find hilarious is seeing how DJ ended up doing it all....oh, well...

Oh, wait, I am hearing DJ interrogate her sister.  Guess she finally realized Indigo wasn't helping.

To be honest, I am surprised they are even having Valentine's Day parties.  Wonder if they renamed them "friendship celebrations" or something?

How many parents out there had kids that are having parties at school?  I'm just curious as to which way the pendulum is swinging these days?

Nothing Sexier...

...Then a man cleaning...Unless he's doing it because he knows you are allergic to dust, and he noticed this on all of the light fixture:

But, what makes the fact he's cleaning even hotter?

When he does it while wearing a kilt.
Now that, to me, is sexy!

Day 41 - Weird Tuesday

My day started well.  It was snowing.  I was up and awake and happy.
(guest photographer for this one).

Little did I know, that would be the best part of my day.  Oh, well....at least traffic wasn't screwed up.  The ground was too warm for the snow to actually stick.  So everything was dripping.

Crappy Tuesday

It's only10 am Pacific Time, and my day is pretty crappy already.

Why?  My company announced Q4 2008 earnings today.  I knew it was going to be bad....but not as bad as it was.  The company burned through half of our cash.....in three months!  Yes, my dear friends, HALF of the cash.  $30M+ .... gone.  Throw in the fact our revenue was $40M less than predicted.....and our quarter was beyond fucked up.  And, all of this before 7:30am!

I listened to the call with my boss, the CIO.  She shared with me her thoughts afterwards - thoughts that included statements about what she thinks about her peers.  I can't help but quote Gordon Ramsey by saying "we are in the shit".  He usually uses that phrase when no one seems to realize their business is in crisis.  I'm feeling just as exasperated.  It was nice to hear from the CIO that some of my feelings of where we have gone wrong were dead on with what she believes as well .... but understanding it doesn't fix it, especially when you are in IT.  The whole analogy of "you can bring the horse to water, but not make them drink" definitely applies.  

At 8:30am, we had an all company meeting which is pretty par for the course on days like today.  First off, I was surprised at how many employees didn't even read the one page press release.  Many were seeing our loss and the cash thing for the first time.  Now, I'm understanding my boss's frustration when she has said "are people going to finally realize how critical this is when we can't make payroll - and it's too late?!"   Yes, ma'am, I think that appears to be the case.

Then, in an effort by the executives, to show they are in lock step, they did a Q&A session with the employees.  During the Q&A session, the cracks became clear.  Not everyone is in lock step.  There are some major issues with people taking ownership of their functions...I mean true ownership of the failures and not just the successes.  One of the last questions resulted in a conversation that exemplified the point.  

Besides earnings, I'm dealing with a carry over SOX issue from last year.  What should have been resolved very cleanly has resulted in, yet again, another failure.  This issue we keep encountering is what I call IT 101.  It is the easiest and most important part of our jobs, and yet, they can't seem to do it.  My cohort's response to me being extremely pissed off about this one: "I'll have my guys come up with a process document because that's the issue."  I pissed him off when I replied "Great, you should do that.  In the meantime, can they do their fucking job?"  In hindsight, probably not the best answer to a self-proclaimed hot head, but this is a pretty big deal. And, it makes us look totally incompetent.   I needed to hear something more than "we'll create a fucking document".  

This is going to be a long fucking day at this rate.  Oh, and it's snowing out which means traffic and everything is also fucked up.  Have I mentioned, I'm in a shitty mood?

Sigh - guess I'll head over the Another Suburban Mom's site to make sure I do the right things when I go out to find another job.....she's had some good info lately.....